December 31, 2010
Here I am 10:15pm New Year's Eve all alone...sort of. My son sleeps soundly in the next room and my hubby is at work, but I won't be kissing anyone come midnight so for all celebrating purposes I'm alone at this moment. The year creeping to a close around me, the dirty New York snow piled up outside, I could be on the brink of tears. I mean just because I'm a mom does not mean I don't want to be out on a night like this or even snuggled on the couch with my man and a bottle of bubbly.
Alas, I am here doing something else. Tentative, not wanting to bring in the New Year on a bad note, but here, writing and it's making me feel a bit better. Listening to music of my own choice...a mix...a little depressing, but lovely and contemplative too. So it's quiet and that means I get to think about my past year. The successes and the failures. We all do this at the beginning of the year. Usually, about the 3rd of January after the hangover has worn off and the time for resolutions has begun. New Year's Eve is usually spent in revelry. We made it through the past year and we toast the endless possibilities of the year to come. It's exciting to think of what the future will bring. To say good-bye to the mistakes of our past. We bask in the best of us, "Here's to all that we can be!"
But tonight I'm not drinking due to a lingering cough and rather than look too far forward I can't help, but think about 2010. Because seriously, it feels like just last week I was making my resolutions for 2010. Where did it go? I mean I was supposed to have accomplished so much. Perhaps even have a new job... so much for that. Blogger does not count. I was supposed to have taught my son the alphabet. He knows a few letters, but can count to 20. OK that's his accomplishment not mine. I was supposed to have finished editing my husbands screenplay. He's the most forgiving boss I've ever had. I could go on and on, but that's my tedium not yours. Suffice it to say that I've much to do in 2011.
Of course, 2010 wasn't a waste. No year ever is. I've learned a great deal more about the publishing business. I taught a successful class of one student, but damn if she did not become a little bit better writer because of me. I published a novel. Had some amazing times traveling to see family and friends. Laughed a lot with my love. Cried less than in past years. Spent many a happy day in the park with Noah. Shared a few bottles of wine and great conversations with my mommy friends, and my non mommy friends. Felt like a writer. Had a few stolen moments in the sun. Read some really great books.
I guess it wasn't a bad year at all. Just a bit meandering. So for 2011 I resolve to focus on my writing career. Manage my time better. So that I can keep my mommy 'day' job, but support it better with some night time words. It sounds so simple. But it takes discipline. Perhaps, I should up the yoga in 2011 too. Just for good measure. Let's see, I always add a cook more interesting meals resolution as well. That sounds about right.
Now it's your turn. What do you resolve for 2011? Whatever it is I wish you success. I also wish you good humor for any failures. Be kind to yourself, gentle with your soul.
Happy New Year!!!
XOXO
PS I wish you all a kiss at the stroke of midnight!
Thank you for the wish of a kiss
ReplyDeleteRon Pearl