Ringing in the New Year Alone - The Highlights

                                                                                December 31, 2010

Here I am 10:15pm New Year's Eve all alone...sort of.  My son sleeps soundly in the next room and my hubby is at work, but I won't be kissing anyone come midnight so for all celebrating purposes I'm alone at this moment.  The year creeping to a close around me, the dirty New York snow piled up outside, I could be on the brink of tears.  I mean just because I'm a mom does not mean I don't want to be out on a night like this or even snuggled on the couch with my man and a bottle of bubbly.

Alas, I am here doing something else.  Tentative, not wanting to bring in the New Year on a bad note, but here, writing and it's making me feel a bit better.  Listening to music of my own choice...a mix...a little depressing, but lovely and contemplative too.  So it's quiet and that means I get to think about my past year.  The successes and the failures.  We all do this at the beginning of the year.  Usually, about the 3rd of January after the hangover has worn off and the time for resolutions has begun.  New Year's Eve is usually spent in revelry.  We made it through the past year and we toast the endless possibilities of the year to come.  It's exciting to think of what the future will bring.  To say good-bye to the mistakes of our past.  We bask in the best of us, "Here's to all that we can be!"

But tonight I'm not drinking due to a lingering cough and rather than look too far forward I can't help, but think about 2010.  Because seriously, it feels like just last week I was making my resolutions for 2010.  Where did it go?  I mean I was supposed to have accomplished so much.  Perhaps even have a new job... so much for that.  Blogger does not count.  I was supposed to have taught my son the alphabet.  He knows a few letters, but can count to 20.  OK that's his accomplishment not mine.  I was supposed to have finished editing my husbands screenplay.  He's the most forgiving boss I've ever had.  I could go on and on, but that's my tedium not yours.  Suffice it to say that I've much to do in 2011.

Of course, 2010 wasn't a waste.  No year ever is.  I've learned a great deal more about the publishing business.  I taught a successful class of one student, but damn if she did not become a little bit better writer because of me.  I published a novel.  Had some amazing times traveling to see family and friends. Laughed a lot with my love.  Cried less than in past years.  Spent many a happy day in the park with Noah.  Shared a few bottles of wine and great conversations with my mommy friends, and my non mommy friends.  Felt like a writer.  Had a few stolen moments in the sun.  Read some really great books.

I guess it wasn't a bad year at all.  Just a bit meandering.  So for 2011 I resolve to focus on my writing career.  Manage my time better.  So that I can keep my mommy 'day' job, but support it better with some night time words.  It sounds so simple.  But it takes discipline.  Perhaps, I should up the yoga in 2011 too.  Just for good measure.  Let's see, I always add a cook more interesting meals resolution as well.  That sounds about right.

Now it's your turn.  What do you resolve for 2011?  Whatever it is I wish you success.  I also wish you good humor for any failures.  Be kind to yourself, gentle with your soul.

Happy New Year!!!
XOXO
PS  I wish you all a kiss at the stroke of midnight!  

Best Last Minute Gift

                                                                                   Decemeber 24, 2010

You're panicing.  It's the day before Christmas and you've still got a few loose ends on your 'nice' list.  I've got the perfect gift for you.  It doesn't cost much and comes in thousands of varieties so you can find one for anyone you love or are only mildly aquainted.  It can be as intimate as lingerie or as platonic as Christmas socks.  One stop shopping for the entire family leaving you with plenty of time for Christmas cheer. 

Curious? 

Head on into your local bookstore and you will find something for everyone on your list.  Children are probably the easiest to buy for in this catagory because the children/tween section is loaded with amazing, imagination-building books.  For really little ones the "If You Give a Moose a Muffin" series by Laura Numeroff is always a hit.  For the tweeners I hear "The Red Pyramid" by Rick Riordan is the way to go.  But then there's always the latest in teenage angst vampire novels.  No shortage of those any time soon. 

But what about my dad?  Husband? New-sort of dating, but not quite sure, guy in my life?  Well, there's plenty of non-fiction out there that I'd recommend for men.  A book on one of their favorite hobbies from beer-making to boating.  Sports books abound if they're into golf or baseball.  Then there are the mountains of history books that men seem charmed by.  There's always the latest biography of Benjamin Franklin a Renaissance man, to say the least.  Travel books are great if you want to hint at a certain future vacation destination.   

Then there are the more intimate purchases.  The more expensive coffee table books.  These are beautifully made books, with pictures and articles about subjects like Man Ray to picturesque mountain scapes.  These kinds of books are a "wow" gift if you give a little thought as to what the person you're buying for is really  into. 

You could also go the 'couple' cookbook route which can be very sexy.  Buy the ingredients for one of the desserts so you can dive in as soon as the relatives fly out. 

While we're in the cook book section you could pick-up one for your sister (if she's into that) or your young mom friend who's trying to find kid friendly recipes that her kids will actually eat. Cook books for the right person can be a wonderful Christmas present.

Lastly, we come to my favorite section.  Fiction.  These are the books you buy for people you know a little bit better.  There are so many to choose from it's difficult to narrow down if you don't know someone that well.  But take a chance!  Buy what you'd like to read.  "The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo" series are very popular.  And I know, they are everywhere.  Honestly, though, they are a good read.  One I'm dying to read myself is "Great House" by Nicole Krauss.  Take your time, take a deep breath, and judge those books by thier covers. 

When you stroll out of your favorite book store you'll feel the weight of your Christmas stress fade away.  Now all you have to do is wrap!

Merry Christmas!

XO     

A Grammar Rebel

                                                                                       December 14


I'm going to admit a dirty little secret.  One that as a writer is really quite embarrassing, but here it goes.  I have terrible grammar.  It sticks out when I first begin writing something, however, once I find the flow of the story it settles down and I discover the natural tone of our language.  I have a fabulous editor and many grammars that save my skin, but it's still there lurking.  I've never put too much thought into where or when these grammar rules began.  Was it an ancient Queen who decided as she sat about at tea that  took was simple better sounding than taked?  Was it further back when English was formed from a mesh of Germanic derivations?  And why am I thinking about this now?

I have a son who is just beginning to put this confusing unexacting language together.  He's doing quite well.  Sentences flow out of his little mouth that were impossible only a few months ago.  He's also making connections in the language, creating the past tense of words on his own.  For example, he'll say "I saved you."  Which works.  Yet, he'll also say, "I catched you," which doesn't.  He's making these
language leaps which is very exciting, but I still feel the need to correct him.  I don't say he's doing it wrong.  I simply say the correct phrase so he can hear it.  "I caught you."  I assume this is a natural way of learning our language because I know I've never said, "I maked dinner."  And sometimes he'll say things with spot on accuracy.

It's interesting to me as a lover of words how our mind grasps and builds our speech patterns.  Really, it's beyond the diagraming of sentences because before we ever get to school so much of these rules are already in use, if not completely understood.  We're processing the natural pacing of conversations, speaking with a decent vocabulary, and communicating rather clearly before we ever learn to read.  So why is it that what seems natural to a child, and perhaps within the language itself, is wrong?  What's wrong with shaked rather than shook?  Who decided?  Why is it i before e except after c?  Why is c so special?

I realize that language is a living thing.  That these changes and grammar rules did not all come about at once.  And being part of a civilized society we agree to these rules as we do to the constitution.  But I can relate to those school children who question just why our language is so quirky.  It's not like that in the romance languages, most of their rules are absolute.  Exceptions are a rarity.  Not the norm.

It's funny that I never thought about grammar as having an origin before my son brought this to my attention.  I've always tried so hard to squeeze my creative mind into the uniformity of English grammar. Hated myself for the abundance of red on my diagramed sentences.  Wanted so badly to conform that I did not question.  Alas, it is time.  For out of the mouth of babes I've seen that our language does have a natural pattern that we have imposed our uppity rules upon.  Could I let my son be the rebel that I myself cannot be?  Allow him to lead a grammar revolution.  (Text language not withstanding.)  Try as I might I cannot,  for I must correct him, I can't help myself.        

First Novel Reading

                                                                                   December 9, 2010

     So Friday night was my first big reading!  I was psyched to get out there and let the world hear a little "I  Don't Know Jack."  I dressed up.  Wore the nice jeans not the mommy ones and believe me there is a difference.  Put on my makeup like I used to do for nights out clubbing.  And loaded my bag with BOOKS to sell!  Then headed down to Tribeca for the reading.  Now I'll give you this it was a small start.  A reading that a fellow grad student was putting on in support of her budding theater company.  But by start time the small room was packed!  A wonderful sign.  Plus, the first few readers were fantastic.  They spanned the arc of fiction, memoir and monologue.  What a treat these writers were to hear, and they'd brought with them an excellent group of literary aficionados.
     I was the first reader after the break.  I'd finished my one glass of wine, enough to take the edge off, but not enough to cause slurring, a fine line on an empty stomach.  Listened to my introduction and then walked up to the podium.  My BOOKS stacked neatly on the table next to me.  I couldn't believe I was reading next to a pile of my own BOOKS.  It was a little surreal.  I smiled, gave a brief summary of where I was reading from in the novel, opened the book in my hand (saw my own name on the cover, and got giddy) then began.
    Now an important note to myself when reading from a book where the main character is a man... make sure the audience gets it.  For the first few lines, as I described my ex girlfriend seductively sprawled out on the couch, I could see the audience trying to place me in the scene.  But it wasn't my scene it was Jack's.  So I tried to make it clear when I read the standing up pissing part that I was, indeed, reading as a man.  By that point, I'm pretty sure they were with me.  Or else they just thought I was a very strange girl.
     As I continued on they were definitely riding my wave and it felt great.  I wasn't a let down after the other readers, but an addition to help round out a night of excellent storytelling.  I even got a few laughs, even better, they were at the right places!  As I read my last line, "I'm finding in paranoia there is clarity," the room filled with applause and I left the podium feeling certain my words had rested on a few hearts that night.
     Now for the most amazing part.  I did not sell a single BOOK.  Here I was surrounded by a room full of kindred spirits.  Artists, writers, actors and creative types that find themselves at readings on Friday nights... of course that explains it right there.  We're all broke!
     So I took with me some really great compliments, left a few cards in hopes people will go to the website, and walked out into the cool city air.  It was a beautiful night for a stroll, just me and my bag of Books!!!    

I Don't Know Jack

I Get the Hype

                  

                                                                                               

                                                                 September 10, 2010

            I figured I better put my money were my mouth is and actually see what the e-reader phenomenon is all about.  Yesterday I downloaded the ibooks app to my iphone.  Guess what book comes with the download?   Winnnie-The-Pooh by A. A. Milne!  So I began scrolling through the pages and to add to the wonder I discovered the book comes with full illustrations (or decorations as they are called in the book) by Ernest H. Shepard.   My iphone suddenly seemed less like a technological device and more like a magic carpet.  Every bit of the book was there in its original form.  Not that I suspected it would be different, but I thought the small screen would mess with the formatting, or the printing would be uniform, Times New Roman.  I had an idea what e-reading would be like, after all I’ve been writing on computers forever.  Yet, seeing an actual book reproduced so perfectly filled me with hope!

            I even liked the way the app opens up to a virtual bookshelf.  Such a simple idea, but one an avid book collector (or as avid as one can be in a small New York apartment) can feel comfortable browsing through, a home away from home like the stacks in the library.  Don’t get me wrong as cool as the app is it is not a tactile experience.  Hence, the virtual aspect of the e-book, it’s like fingering through a novel, but not quite. 

            It seems the designers have thought of everything.  They have ways to highlight passages, and even choose your own color…pink for me.  You can leave yourself notes on the text and bookmark your spot.  It’s very user friendly I must say, even me a low-tech girl was able to figure it all out.  However, I still see myself taking notes on a piece of paper and scribbling down page numbers of memorable paragraphs.  For me it would be faster to reference later.  Admittedly, I am a bit old fashion.  Perhaps, I’ll eventually, embrace the e-reader completely. 

            What is wonderful about this is that I’m one step closer to having my own book available.  I also realize that I have choices to make as far as font and book jacket design.  It’s rather fantastic.  The text, the story is important, but then so is the cover.  After all we all judge books by their covers.  And though we can’t see what people are reading on the subway when they use e-readers, (and secretly judge their book taste) it’s still important to welcome the reader into the book.  Urge them onward with a gentle title page.  Subtly express what the story is about with a poem or phrase.  Let them linger on the names of the dedication and wonder at who they are or once were.  All of this before the reader ever gets to the first chapter.  I’ve lots of decisions to make.

            I’m off to go font-shopping…opinions are welcome.             

Author to Bookmaker

                                          September 23, 2010

  

            Seriously, there has to be a programming guy out there who can make one e-book readable for all e-readers.  I spent way too long last night formatting and reformatting and reformatting my novel in order to get it into a language that works for several different media.  I realize that that’s why ‘publishers’ get the big bucks because they are the ones stuck with all the tedious work.  However, being as I managed even with my low-tech knowledge it makes you wonder how necessary the publishers are?  With less money being spent on marketing new authors and more going to already established, sure thing authors like Mr. Dan Brown.  Really, he needs more press?  You wonder if perhaps this self-publishing is a smart way to go?

            Now don’t get me wrong I had about a million questions last night that I had to go and find answers to myself.  So what would probably take a publisher tech guy two minutes to do kept me searching for hours.  It’s a learning experience, and by the end it really will be my book alone.  Aside from the cover art which a fantastic artist, friend (Tony Parker) did I will have created the entire thing.  It may cost me a ridiculous amount of time that could have been spent writing a new book.  However, in the end it very well may be worth it.

            I now know the difference between a .doc and a .pdf file.  I know the standard template measurements for an industry paperback.  I learned that my novel could be 326 pages, 478 pages, or 218 pages depending on how it’s formatted.  Really.  For those of you interested the final edition will be around 218 pages, which is cost effective for the reader.  I learned that chapters begin on odd numbered pages.  So they’ll always start on the right.  How many books have I read and never really paid attention to something so simple.  I’m not sure if the technical aspect of books is something that will enhance my joy.  I’ve always loved them for the stories inside and never had to think about how they were actually put together.  Though, maybe I will appreciate them even more for the time that someone took to develop the cover, format the copyright pages, and the title page before the author’s words are ever read.  Perhaps, once this is all finished I’ll be able to don two hats author and bookmaker.  Not that I’ll be opening up a bookmaking shop anytime soon.  I’ve got another novel in mind that’s just waiting to be written! 

Book Trailers? I think not.

              September 18, 2010

            Getting closer to the publishing date!  Finished rereading and reediting the novel last night and, of course toasted myself with some wine.  What I felt was that this is a good story.  I’ve been away from it for a while and found some gems in the writing as well.  There was some overwriting too, as to be expected from a first novel, but nothing that wasn’t easily toned down.  Overall, I was pleasantly surprised and hope you are too! 

            Now I have to move on to the technical aspect of all of this.  I begin putting this novel out there in the world very soon.  I’ve got to e-publish and then figure out how to create a pod cast.  Yup, that’s me super high –tech over here.  Working the on-line marketing angels as best I can.  Any other suggestions are, of course, welcome.  I’ve found they have these things now called book trailers.  Like movie trailers, but for books.  Honestly, they’re kind of hilarious.  I mean some are actually mini movies for the books.  A lot of them are in the sci-fi, suspense, or mystery genre.  They kind of lend themselves to that kind of marketing.  But there are a lot of these out there and just like there’s low-budget movie trailers there’s low-budget and high-budget book trailers too.  I got sucked into spending way too much time watching these.  Thought for a brief moment about making one, but then changed my mind. 

            I’m not sure they sell books.  I wasn’t sold on them anyway.  Plus, it’s not like movies that actually show trailers for other movies in movie theaters.  Book trailers have to be sought out on the web or the book’s web page.  And there is a cheese factor to the book trailer.  It can’t be denied.  I’m a little bit of a book snob, and to market a book the way you would a horror film seems a bit silly.  (Watch me eat these words some day.)  However, book ads look better and more dignified scrawled across The New York Times or along the side of a page in The New Yorker.  Now, I know that those ads don’t have the impact on sales that they once did.  But what does?  We are diversifying as an audience.  Television has begun to adapt to this new age of niche marketing.  People have so much to choose from that it takes less viewers to consider a show a success.  It’s led to some much better programming, and to much worse.  The same is now true for books, to be considered a best-seller you only have to sell about 30,000 books, which is much less than in the past. 

            The question is how to reach 30,000 people that would find this book interesting?  A small feat if you’re Coca Cola quite a challenge if you’re Vicki Nicholson.  Alas, I will forge ahead and for now hold off on the book trailer.  But keep your eyes open for the youtube readings!!!    

PS  A few places you can check out book trailers for yourself…

bookscreening.com

www.book-trailers.net

Revisiting your First

                                                                            September 8, 2010

            Revisiting your first novel is like having a conversation with your first love.  It’s awkward, a little embarrassing, but filled with happy surprises.  Of course, there’s lots of ‘if I knew then what I know now’ kinds of thoughts too.  But we never would have grown into the person or writer we are today without those sophomoric beginnings.  Making mistakes, in retrospect, can be a lot of fun.  And as I look back on my first novel I realize that I’m not going to change too much, because even though some of those metaphors make me cringe now, they are part of the character I created then. 

            Though I’m nervous to reveal this book.  I’m also thrilled.  There are moments that I thought of deleting, like the part in Chapter 12, believe me you’ll know it when you read it, but again it is important to the book, for my main character Jack to have that experience.  (And no I never did….)  Aren’t you curious now?  You won’t have to wait long because the book is almost ready! 

            There are moments in the book that I’m most proud.  A scene or two that I think pushed me forward as an artist and a person.  I had to dig deeper than I normally would to express certain feelings and allow my characters to really become unglued.  Relinquishing an emotional safety net of sorts.  I think going there in this book made it easier to find the true spirit of my characters in the next book.  I didn’t have to push for something, rather I was able to open myself up and listen to my characters to find out what they were really experiencing. 

            Growth in any direction personal, artistic, professional is a process and though we might shrink from our early efforts there is merit.  Without them we would never learn about our true abilities.  I’m proud of the novel.  We went through a lot of love and hate Jack and I.  With him I discovered how to write a novel so no matter what happens with the rest of my books, Jack will always be my first. 

                     

Embracing Ebooks, kind of

                                                                                            September 2, 2010

            I just found out that they’re closing the Barnes & Noble across from Lincoln Center.  Normally, news of a bookstore closing, any bookstore, even a mega bookstore, would give me pause.  I would storm around the house ranting to my husband that this is an outrage!  My heart would break a little because people are reading less and those of us who are writing for those people have lost some of our audience.  Even more it means that books are being underappreciated.  Admittedly, I am a tactile person.  I love books.  The intimate physicality of holding one in your hand, turning the pages, dog-earring a favorite passage, this is reading! 

            However, like the CD, books are adapting to this new technological age.  The Barnes & Noble is closing because of less books being sold, yes, and a rent increase too.  Yet, it’s also closing because people are buying more books on-line.  The good news is they are still reading, simply reading differently.  So though I am sad for the loss of another big bookstore in the city, the first being the Barnes & Noble on 6^th Ave.  I can understand the need to work with a different kind of consumer.  Therefore, it bodes well for one, such as myself, who is going the route of e-publication.  Which admittedly has me emotionally torn.

            On the one side I love old-fashioned books.  Snuggling up on the couch with a glass of wine and a good book is an ideal evening.  Turning the page or lingering over a phrase, feeling the worn paper in my hands draws me further into the story.  My mind knows this can’t be true, but it’s what I feel.  I know I’m not alone in this, but it’s also how most of us were taught to read.  Not from screens, but from books.  Yet, those who are converts to the e-readers love them!  Intellectually, it makes perfect sense, rather than carrying around one book you can have your entire library with you.   Environmentally, it’s a very green approach.  No trees are cut to print cyber books.  Plus, the entire e-book phenomenon has given many of us the opportunity to skip the big publishers and go for it!  So little old-fashioned me has become an advocate for the e-book.  However, if you want to pick up a new hard back book seek out your local bookstore.  The treasures you’ll find are worth the trip!        

A Cyber Adventure

                                                                                                    August 30, 2010

            So I’m embarking on a cyber adventure.  Here it goes…publishing an e-book.  How very exciting.  Yet there’s so much to do when marketing oneself.  Our mothers taught us to be demure and polite, but in the day and age of Twitter, Facebook and the like it’s all about shamelessly promoting yourself even if you’ve nothing to promote but your daily routine.  If you’re Brittany Spears people care that you stopped by McDonald’s for a fry and chocolate shake if you’re Vicki Nicholson not so much. 

            Product doesn’t seem to matter at all.  It’s just about celebrity.  However, in this endeavor, my endeavor to get I Don’t Know Jack out there into the world of e-book buyers there is a goal.  A product, if you will, that is worth all the promotion.  So I’m going to keep this little blog to let you know how it’s going.  Use it as a forum for those of you who might want to try e-publishing yourself.  To gain advice from those who have already done this kind of thing and to hopefully amuse the rest of you along the way.  

            So far I’ve met with a web designer who is going to get me going with a fabulous web page for you all to peruse.  I’ve begun to revisit the book, ok that’s a lie I’ve dug the hard copy out from a drawer and set it on my nightstand where it haunts me.  But it will be ready to go because I’ve set myself a deadline of October 1^st.  That’s when I told my web man I’d have the info for him.  So I’ll have to have it ready by then!  And by actually writing this down it only enforces the deadline right?  There are people anxiously awaiting the e-publication so I must not keep them waiting! 

            Which leads to the fear side of going it alone in cyber-land.  How do I know anyone is out there reading?  How do I know I’m not just writing this for myself?  Blogging innately is writing for oneself.  The readers are secondary.  But a blog is a posted journal, which you are putting out there for the cyber world to read and hopefully respond to.  I suppose it’s to stir up others thoughts while stirring up your own.  Sharing fears to ease them.  I’m not a shameless promoter, but I certainly don’t want an unread blog floating out there in cyber land.  That might be a little embarrassing.  So, I invite you to come along on the journey of a non-tech girl embracing the virtues of the e-book world.